1st post adoption visit complete!

China requires post adoption visits (to be conducted by our home study agency) at 1 month, 6 months, one year, 2 years, 3 years and 5 years. Today we completed our 1 month visit. I have to say we passed with flying colors! The case worker was amazed at how well Shi Yu was bonding and how far she had come in such a short period of time. She told us of a couple other families that were struggling. She said the fact that we had such flexible expectations really was very helpful. I guess some families have certain expectations and when they aren't met they get frustrated. I told her we really wished that we had adopted Shi Yu as well as a sister around her age and were slightly still considering it. If we adopted from China it would have to be done asap because of my age. She asked if we would be interested in adopting from Ohio as there is no age limit and we said we might consider it. I would really prefer to adopt from China again for Shi Yu's sake but it us so costly. Good was amazing in helping us with Shi Yu's adoption. Maybe he will help us again. Time will tell but I won't be surprised if Shi Yu eventually has a sister around her age. ; )

Reactions: China/USA- race, gender, age

It has been interesting to see the reactions of people when they see us with Shi Yu. In China there seemed to be 2 main reactions mostly based on race. Naturally, being caucasian in China made us stand out. The Chinese think that any American in China is rich so with all of the flim flam artists we were a great target. People were constantly approaching us a with "best deal" in China. Whether it was tour, renting a car (we could have had a Ferrari lol), housing, trinkets, you name it. Once we had Shi Yu they left us alone (I think it confused them). The Chinese love to see American babies. An adoptive family in our group had there 2 biological children with them and the Chinese adored them, even wanted pictures (every person we saw had an iPhone). People that were walking behind us while we were pushing Shi Yu in a stroller walked quickly past us to see the American baby only to be shocked at seeing an Asian baby. People walking towards us did double takes looking from Shi Yu to us to Shi Yu. I wanted to wear a t shirt that said "yes were American, yes she is Chinese, YES she is ours! So quit looking!" The older people seemed to be much more accepting. At one point when all of or family group and our babies were waiting on the sidewalk, an older woman approached us and asked if she could take our picture. She kept saying "thank you for your kindness, thank you for taking our babies". It was truly from her heart. Dan and I were extremely touched by this. It was so sincere. I wondered if this woman had been one that many years ago was victim to being forced to give up a child.: The newer generations didn't seem quite as accepting. Especially the males. The way things are in China now you can have a second baby but are fined $300000 RMB ($50000 US money). You are also supposed to get permission from the government before you even get pregnant. Our guide told us that this had become more a technicality but it was still something that had to be done. If Dan was walking Shi Yu at a distance from me he got definite stares of disapproval. I kind of understood this though.
   In the USA it seems to be a different reaction. Some based on race but I think more based on age. My age. Although it isn't uncommon to see a 56 year old woman with a 2 year old (the assumption would seem to be it is her granddaughter), seeing a 56 year old woman with an Asian baby seems to puzzle other women. I can see the wheels turning in their heads. Is this her baby? She must be adopted. But that lady seems to old to adopt. What is going in?. Again older women seem more accepting then younger women. Men don't seem to care much. The younger men seem more interested in making Shi Yu smile or laugh. Its pretty cute. I have noticed that it seems more acceptable for an older then usual man to have a young child then it does an older woman.  I have definitely received a few disapproving stares.  It will be interesting to continue down the road of reactions lol.

Home sweet home Shi Yu

After a year of hard work, prayer, trust, taking 6 different flights within 16 or so days our little girl was finally in the home she would live in until she was old enough to go to college or marry. No more going from orphanage to foster care to orphanage. No more being hungry, wry, and cold. No more going without the love and family every child deserves. No more no more. Sometimes I wonder if I was the first one that ever kissed Shi Yu, or said I love you. In many ways I hope that I wasn't. I think about the mother that gave birth to her and wonder if she worries. I think she probably does. I think she would have kept her baby girl if it were possible. I think her heart may be broken. I can only hope that one day she finds out that her baby is in a loving family, being well taken care of, and very happy. In this day and age there are so many agencies that offer the women of China the opportunity to give DNA and if the child one day desires it, she can also give hers and possibly meet her mother. I would never take this opportunity away from Shi Yu. It is get choice. Shi Yu is doing so well so far. She seems to be blossoming like a little flower. She loves music and tries to dance using her head. Yesterday she was watching the Abby lee show. I don't think she had ever seen a Tv and even when we put kids movies on in China for her she didn't seem to get the idea of watching a screen. But when she heard the music and saw the little girls dancing she took notice. It was the first time she REALLY watched. As the music played and the little girls girls danced she began swaying and actually put her arms up and out. It made me cry. She is very aware that she can't walk and do many things the other kids can. You can see it in her eyes when she watches them. She acts almost embarrassed. But with her determination (and she has a lot of it) and with Gods promises I believe it is only a matter of time. I know with all of my heart she will one day be dancing, walking, running. Its just a matter of time. Look out Abby Lee!

Goodbye China, hello my wonderful USA!

Last full day! Finally! I have said from the beginning I just want my child and then take her home! I must say it was so nice to be with other families that totally understood the desire to not only adopt but also to appt from China. Even though our journeys differed, the goal was the same. I was surprised that we were not the only "older" couple. There was even another family with grandchildren like us.It is becoming more and more common which is fantastic. There were also families adopting their first child. This had been such am amazing experience that it can't be described. To begin this journey and finally met the little face behind the picture then to see their personality begin to bloom and grow. So many new discoveries.I don't think it compared to anything. On this last day I couldn't focus on anything but getting Shi Yu home. I was so anxious I packed everything that could be packed ahead of time. The hotel had an amazing outdoor area for kids that was actually on the forth floor of the hotel and was surrounded be the hotel. It had a play area, water falls, and was just beautiful. Shi Yu didn't care for the play area and was a little scared of the swings and slide so we used it several times  to take walks in her stroller, which she loved. The waterfall was the only place you could get a little cool mist breeze and I could have stood by it for a long time. The climate in Guangzhou is like a sauna and the second you go outside you think you will melt.  We walked to the 7/11 which was attached outside of the hotel (there are 7/11's everywhere) to get enough water for the night and next morning and basically did nothing but attend a meeting by the guides to explain how our return home would be.  Most families had made their own flight arrangements but the agency had made the arrangements to get everyone back to their main point, in our case Beijing. This was a little scary because even though a guide took you to the airport and got you checked in we would be in our own after that. This meant arriving at Beijing, having a layover and getting in the plane to the USA. We went to bed early that night. We had to have our bags ready to go at 6:30am. The next morning and I was so ready to go! Shi Yu was fantastic and just went with the flow through the whole trip and she continued to do so. The guide took us to the airport and got us checked in. We were rather lucky because of my knees (which were severely banged up by this point from having to get off and on buses and airplanes quickly or be trampled on) and were able to get assistance at almost every point. Without this I think we would have never found our way around lol. I was pretty tired of going through the security checkpoints by this time. Poor Dan had to deal with 3 carry on's, 3 backpacks and a baby. Once we got to Beijing he had to deal with that AND THE 3 SUITCASES! We had no idea that we would have to take all of that on a bus to a different terminal about 3 miles away. Then we were dropped off in the middle of the street. Poor Dan was trying to unload all the luggage and carry the baby. I hobbled over and tool the baby to safety and turned to see Dan in the middle of the road with 3 big suitcases, 3 carry on's and 3 backpacks and cars buzzing by. It was crazy. I was so grateful when everyone was safe on the sidewalk. We did get help once we checked in and they guided us all the way to the gate. What relief. By now I was desperate to be in my own country were I could actually communicate with a person if there was a problem. I kept telling myself there was just one more flight to our country then one more flight to home. I was so relieved when we finally got on that plane. Shi Yu wasn't noticing a thing and was quite happy lol. We would end up being awake and flying a total of about 30 hours. Shi Yi slept almost the whole time through the flights and I was so proud of her for being such a good girl. Of course she did have her own seat and half of mine to stretch out on. The flight coming home seemed so much longer then the flight going! The really neat thing was that as soon  or plane touched ground in the US, Shi Yu would automatically become a US citizen. I had my camera ready the second the plane touched in Chicago! When we arrived at Pittsburgh airportwe were exhausted but so happy to be home with our baby! My brother met us at the airport and boy was I happy to see him! Shi Yu was her usual shy timid self with him. She is very very timid and shy around new people but who can blame her with all she has been through. I wouldn't trust anyone either. We got our luggage, filled a claim for our missing stroller, and were on or way home! Unfortunately we had to be delayed by a minor fender Bender. Oh lord would we ever get home? It was past midnight! Insurance cards were exchanged and finally we were in or way again. Please lord, no more delays. We were almost home when 3 deer ran out in the road. The good lord must have thought we needed a break and we didn't hit them. Within minutes we finally pulled into or driveway! Home sweet home has never had so much meaning.

Hello sub tropic Guangzhou

Shi Yu did great on the flight! She slept the whole time.  Holy cow! I have never been in the sub tropics before and want quite expecting the heat and humidity. We Americans quickly began melting lol.I had learned in Zhengzhou to forget trying to wear make up or spending time on my hair that ended up a frizzy mess. But thus was a whole new level. We were met by the adoption guides and thankfully given water as soon as we got in the bus. As usual while on the bus the guides gave us the run down of all the meetings and appointments we would be attending. Our goal here was to attain Shi Yu's visa. We would need to take an oath that we would take care of jet and she would need a physical and tb test (hate that part). It took for ever to get to the hotel even though it was close the traffic as usual was horrid. This hotel was very nice. But as usual we were warned to be careful. Especially the men because there are many women there that were lets say, making a living. Because of my knees (which by now had become destroyed) we weren't looking at doing a lot of walking. Shi Yu had really come out of her shell and was becoming a very happy little girl. She was secondarily a daddys girl. As a matter of fact she only wanted Daddy. I think she was overwhelmed at having 2 people suddenly fusing over her. I decided to step back and give her some space. After a day or so this seemed to really work. She began reaching out for me and accepted me as her Mom. What a relief for Daddy who was getting pretty worn out lol. Thank goodness for the stroller (that she loved) the adoption reps were able to get in Zhengzhou.  Guangzhou was very busy as the country was days away from celebrating their moon cake holiday. It is very big there, almost like or Christmas. Families sit outside and admire the moon while sharing with one another and saying prayers. It is also a time of gift giving. The moon cake is then enjoyed. There were moon cake signs everywhere and huge lines of people buying them. I had tasted the moon cake at my brothers before we left (it does come in different flavors). It is a little bland and not as sweet compared to most American treats but I have come to learn that China doesn't throw a bunch of sugar into things to sweeten them. They tend to use sweet vegetables, beans, etc. it its so much healthier and not hard to get used to. The cake is round and about one inch thick. It is more like pie crust then cake with a thick filing in it.
The day came for all of the families to get on the bus for the childrens required physicals.  There was a line down the street waiting to get into the hospital. We were going to a different section so the only wait we had was for the doctors to get organized. There were 4 areas each child had to visit. Ear nose and throat, general exam, vision, and the tb test. Each parent just went to each section when there was an opening. It didn't take long. The wrist party was the tb test. They don't let the parents in. Shi Yu's seemed to take forever and we could heart her screaming. Our guide explained that it is sometimes hard for the doctor to find a vein. We knew that thank you. What we don't know is why we have spent a week binding with or child and getting her to trust us only to let strangers pull her away and do painful things! I thought Dan was going to cry or burst in the room to rescue her. Thank goodness when they returned her! The worst was over! A couple days later we went to the consulate and Swype or oath to love, provide, and protect Shi Yu. It was very anti climactic. Then they checked all of or paperwork and gave us Shi Yu's visa so we could bring her home! Thank you lord! Tomorrow we would be coming home! I couldn't wait to chime home to our country where I could understand people and easily handle normal situations like going somewhere, shopping for the baby, etc.. And most of all I couldn't wait for Shi Yu to finally be where she belonged!

Goodbye Zhengzhou

While still in Zhengzhou we returned to the registrars building (where we met her). Our adoption paperwork had been officially completed and approved. We were each awarded or official decree of adoption in a beautiful red leather holder. Shi Yu was ours! No more worrying about something happening to mess things up. Shi Yu had always been mine I'm my heart but now it was legal and nothing could change that! Later that day we would receive her passport and our job in Zhengzhou was done! Time to get in or 3Rd plane and head for Guangzhou where we would apply for her visa and finally bring her home! True to his word, Shi Yu's health is nothing like reported. She is an amazing little girl and so smart!

I have to say that God is so amazing. From the beginning he told me to trust him concerning Shi Yu and her health. I have to admit there were times when it was hard, especially when we would get an update telling its what she "couldn't" do. But I reminded myself that God was in charge and I had nothing to worry about.  We didn't care what she could or couldn't do only that with us being older we could give her what she needs for a good life.  Along with that I held to gods word that he "healed the sick" and refused to believe anything else. It was an up and down back and forth time. Even on the day we met Shi Yu i felt we were being tested. But God showed us how amazing he is. Shi Yu is far and above any expectation we could have. Its like I told my Mom, she its like a little treasure chest and every day she surprises us with what she can do. I can't say I will miss Zhengzhou. It is definitely not as westernized as Beijing. Eating at the "westernized" hotel restaurant buffet consisted of chicken heart, lungs and other things I didn't understand. Yuck! I was pretty much existing on the breakfast buffet that was very good at all hotels. Shi Yu on the other hand enjoyed anything you put in her mouth lol. And I loved putting it there. She is a joy!  Oh! Some other things Shi Yu showed its she can do...hold and use a sippee cup, scribble with a crayon in a coloring book (she liked the blue crayon and kept handing back the red one when we gave it to her), brush her hair (or tries lol), and so much more! She loves taking a bath. That's when she really starts talking and singing. She must have watched people cooking because if there is anything that resembles a bowl she will use her brush to stir the imaginary ingredients.  I almost forgot! Her stacking cups! From the first day we had her she would spend hours, and I mean hours, placing the cups inside each other. When they weren't right she would undo them and keep working until they were right. We were amazed! Right now they are her favorite toy. She is a genius lol. I think that wraps Zhengzhou up. Off to Guangzhou!

A new day is here!

Our first whole day with Shi Yu! And what a day it was! Shi Yu had many surprises for Mom and Dad!  Overnight she had become more secure and more comfortable being herself. It was like a miracle. Throughout the day she began making sounds (we were told she could not laugh or make sounds), she started hiding her arms out for Daddy, she stood up with help, her Daddy taught her a bad trick (that it is funny to drop things for someone else to pick up!), she saw her lady bug flip flops and pointed at them so we put them in and she was so excited! Just like a little diva lol, her ball rolled under the bed and Daddy told her to get it and she used another toy to get it out, and she laughed a LOT!,